From the Desk of Ty-Vol. 2

From the Desk of Ty

Vol. 2

Week two was much better than week one. To start with, no knife wielding psycho-woman came after me. Let me tell you, that’s how I want to start all my weeks off!

I’ve learned a lot about my Mommy. First off, she’s an enabler. Every few hours she’s shoving that pointy teat in my mouth and forcing me to suckle. It’s enough to make anyone a milk-aholic! I don’t have a problem, but a weaker person might get milk drunk. Not me. I just take long naps afterwards—completely unrelated to the milk.

The best part of feeding… it provides ammunition. That way I can get Mommy and Daddy with my water cannon. I keep aiming for them, but they’re getting too smart. They’ve started putting a holster on my cannon. But I’m patient. One day they’ll slip up and Mommy and Daddy will get soaked again.

Daddy had to go to a place called work this week. I don’t really understand what that is, but neither he nor Mommy seemed to excited about it. He’s gone for a long time, then comes home really tired. I keep telling him we can take a nap together, but Mommy keeps trying to keep me awake during the day. I tell her I want to sleep with Daddy, but she doesn’t understand. Women? Can’t live with ‘em… can’t eat without ‘em.

The bright spot in my week were visits from Honey, Oma and Big Daddy. We have so much fun. They don’t make me sleep when I don’t want to. Don’t tell Mommy, but late at night they take me about of my cell (there are bars around my bed!) and let me stay up. I think I’m going to get along with my grandparents just fine.

I’d better get back to my cell, so no one notices that I’ve been on Daddy’s black box. I’ll write again soon.