Week 9

Mom has officially surpassed the time that the doctors had given her, but she definitely doesn't have much time left. She is sleeping a lot and has lost all appetite. She is incredibly confused and doesn't make much sense now either. I've been pretty strong for the last few weeks, but today was the first REALLY hard day.

We've lost mom piece by piece for a long time, and now I have lost the ability to have any sort of conversation with her. My mom has been my best friend, the person I called every day, the person I want when I've been sick or having problems. And now I can't call her every day and I can't tell her about what's going on or get advice. It's been very hard to loose my mom, but today I've realized I have lost my friend.

Update

Mom is doing pretty bad today. Its definitely the sickest she's been, she's running a little bit of a fever, and her breathing has slowed a lot. She's lost her appetite almost completely now, and she seems more confused mentally by the day. The nurses have told us they fear that the cancer is starting to take over, but I also know mom is losing her will to fight. This battle has been such a long one. Its been 8 weeks of constant throwing up, fevers, swelling feet, and more. I pray that when it is time, it will be peaceful for everyone, and that we will all have peace knowing mom will have finally won her battle.
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More Lives Than A Cat

I've been back in Greenville today, and once again am totally confused by a "good day" for mom. She looked great this morning, got up washed her hair, put on makeup and we even got out of the house. Of course, then she had enough...probably pushed it a little too far and we had to get her back home to rest. She said she felt pretty bad by that point but she still looked better than she has in days. She doesn't seem to be getting quite as sick as in past days, but her feet are still very swolen.

And get this - for the first time in 7 weeks - her bowels actually started working! I asked the nurses what that meant and they haven't really had any answers for me. So we continue to get through each day, trying hard not to jump to conclusions - good or bad - trusting God for todays answers and praying for another good day tomorrow. One day at a time...

Meanwhile, a friend put it perfectly earlier today...she really does seem to have more lives than a cat!

Another favorite...

Mom

We were told today to expect very little more time with mom. She's running a fever again, and none of her other symptoms have improved. I will continue to post - just please continue to pray for her peace in the days to come.
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The Latest Developments

I'm sorry it has been a while since my last post. It has been a very rough couple of weeks. Mom is staying pretty confused because of the levels of meds and the state of her current health. So some days she remembers why things are the way that they are and other times she doesn't. We've had to have a lot of conversations multiple times, and you find you can only remind someone you love a couple of times that there is nothing else the doctors can do before you just want to stop having the conversation and breaking her heart and your own for the 100th time.

She is throwing up more and more each day, and now her feet are starting to swell and bruise. Apparently this is a sign that her body is shutting down so we are preparing ourselves for a few more weeks at the most.

She still tells me some days that things are going to work themselves out and she just knows this blockage will resolve itself. She just knows she's going to be fine again. I'm not sure how much of this she still truly believes and how much of it is just ingrained from years and years of fighting this disease. I tell her she's right and it is all going to be ok - I tell her this because I know God is taking care of her every step of the way and when the end does come, she will finally be ok in a way she hasn't been for 8 years. She will finally be cancer free.

13.1

I ran the half marathon in Atlanta on Sunday with my girl friends - it was very theraputic for me, and I feel like it was a little symbolic of my life of late thus the odd title :-).

Mom has been dealing with her own marathon. Each day she has a couple different nurses checking on her, but the past week has been really rough. She had a good few days early last week, but she has started throwing up literally everything she takes in now. Each day is pretty rough for her, and it is the most painful thing in the world to not be able to fix it. I want so badly to call some physician somewhere and get her something that will make her stop throwing up...but right now it seems to be another blockage and we all know there isn't anything anyone can do about that.

All we can do is pray, pray for peace, pray for her comfort, and just cotinuous prayer for God's presence. We listened to an Andy Stanley sermon today when Ty laid down for his nap, and that was really nice. Think I'm going to try to make that a daily happening for us both.

If you live in Greenville or even if you don't, please don't hesitate to come by. Call or don't call...the company does her a lot of good and we'll be heading back to Atlanta at the end of the week. Feel free to call me if you can't reach her or call Carol...but I do believe it is the time to visit.

I love you all very much and please continue to pray.

Lots of Progress

I've been looking through a lot of pics over the last week...thought I'd share some of my favorites over the next few posts...

Mom seems to be doing much better over the last few days. The beautiful weather has helped, and we were actually able to walk down to see the horses yesterday. Mom made it all the way out there and sat out in the sunshine while Ty ran around like a crazed 2-year old giggling about the horses.

It's been a lot...taking care of Ty and Honey too...but we've been enjoying it so much. Today she'd like to get out of the house so we're going to try to go to the store and see how she does. She's still getting sick a lot and is dealing with a lot of sadness, but she is also trying to deal with the sadness and not just pushing it under the rug so that's a good thing.

As always, a million thanks to all of our loved ones for the continued thoughts and prayers.

2 Timothy 4:7
I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.